To Our Mutual Benefit: Nightmares
by Cheshire Pandacat
Summary: TOMB-verse. One night Gokudera had a nightmare, and one night Mukuro did. 6959, one-shot.


A/Ns: I wrote this like three weeks ago, but I kept changing my mind about how I wanted the ending to go. D: (It's Mukuro's fault.)

And I'm just realizing that I should probably stop assuming that only someone who's read TOMB would read the one-shots in that verse and start tacking this at the beginning of them: this is part of a series, and I recommend reading "To Our Mutual Benefit" first, which establishes Gokudera and Mukuro's relationship, as well as the other one-shots that were posted before this one because I've been keeping to a chronology. 8D;;;

Disclaimer: I do not own KHR.

* * *

To Our Mutual Benefit

Nightmares

* * *

_Gokudera_

Gokudera fell asleep so quickly after having sex, Mukuro noted with amusement as he stroked the sleeping Storm guardian's hair. After a minute, he carefully extracted himself from the bed, got dressed, and left the room. He still had a few things to attend to before he could go to sleep himself.

A few hours later, he was finally able to return to his room. Mukuro stepped inside, closed the door, and then paused, frowning.

Something was wrong.

On the bed, Gokudera whimpered softly.

Brow furrowing, Mukuro strode over. Gokudera was tangled in the blanket and curled into a fetal position, muscles twitching, drenched in sweat. As Mukuro watched, he let out another shuddering moan.

A nightmare, then.

Mukuro sat down beside him, and brushed the hair out of Gokudera's face.

Gokudera bolted up with a hoarse yell, then began to pant raggedly, expression twisted with fear and horror. Mukuro half-drew his hand back, a little stung by the reaction to his touch even though he knew it had nothing to do with him personally.

After a moment, Gokudera's eyes finally saw Mukuro. He inhaled sharply, and then collapsed into Mukuro's arms, shaking as tears slipped down his cheeks.

Mukuro froze for a second, then shifted further onto the bed, drawing Gokudera closer against him and stroking his hair and back soothingly.

"Shh," he murmured. "It was just a nightmare, Hayato."

Gokudera's fingers dug into Mukuro's shirt, and though he kept his face buried in Mukuro's shoulder, he shook his head. "Wasn't just a nightmare," he rasped. "It was about… that future… where the Tenth was k-killed… right in front of us…!"

Was that how it had happened? To Mukuro's knowledge, they had no idea whether or not Tsuna's guardians had been present when he'd been shot down. But then, Gokudera hadn't received his future self's memories the way Mukuro had, so his mind was free to conjure up the most horrible scenario it could imagine.

"I see," Mukuro said, hold on Gokudera tightening. He wasn't going to demean Gokudera's fears by calling that scenario just a dream – not when it was obviously a concrete possibility. It didn't matter that the future Tsuna hadn't actually been dead; so long as Tsuna was a prominent figure in the mafia world, he was a target. Gokudera's fears were legitimate.

He could rationalize that they'd changed that future, or provide any number of logical reassurances, but Gokudera knew them all; sometimes not all the logic in the world could reassure the heart.

After a moment, Gokudera's shuddering breaths changed from frightened to frustrated. "It's stupid," he whispered, "to get this fucking upset over a damn dream…"

"It's not," Mukuro said, rubbing Gokudera's back soothingly. "Hayato, you don't have to justify getting upset."

Not over something that could feasibly happen, and was likely the worst thing Gokudera could possibly imagine. Of course Tsuna dying in front of his eyes would be hugely distressing, even as a dream.

"…It's embarrassing," Gokudera muttered at last through clenched teeth, sitting up and pushing back from Mukuro, looking away. His expression was twisted with frustration now. "Crying like this in front of you over just a stupid dream."

Mukuro's gaze went flat. "In front of me, specifically?"

"In front of anyone," Gokudera corrected, shooting Mukuro a sour look. "But especially in front of you," he added in a mumble, looking away again.

"Why?"

Gokudera swiped at his nose and gave a sullen half-shrug. "You're so… composed all the time, and I'm… not."

"So what?" Mukuro reached out, placing his palms on Gokudera's cheeks while his thumbs brushed away the remnants of tears. "Do you honestly wish to be more like me, Hayato?"

"Hell no," Gokudera said automatically, shuddering, and then looked a little chagrined. "Uh, I mean – "

"I'm not offended," Mukuro said dryly. "Hayato, crying is an emotionally healthy way to vent your feelings. There's nothing shameful about it."

Gokudera gave him a skeptical look. "You honestly think that? You seem more like the type to laugh at people for showing weakness."

"Oh, I do," Mukuro said cheerfully, and Gokudera growled. "When people expose their vulnerabilities to an enemy, or to someone whom they can't trust, or even in public, that's hilarious. But it's situational. We're dating, and we're currently in private. So there's nothing humorous about you crying in front of me right now. Besides," he went on, somewhat stiffly, but Gokudera apparently needed to be reminded of this, "it's not like I haven't shown you my own vulnerabilities sometimes."

Gokudera blushed a little, but smiled, half-tentative, half-rueful. "I guess that's true, huh," he said, scratching the back of his head.

Mukuro smiled, and began to run his fingers through Gokudera's hair, mimicking the caresses he enjoyed so well himself. Gokudera's eyelids drifted to half-mast, a blissful expression on his face.

After a minute, the look in Gokudera's eyes became smoky, and he pressed forward until Mukuro was lying back beneath him. Mukuro continued his ministrations, but also tilted his chin up, exposing his throat in a gesture of trust and submission.

Gokudera bent in close to kiss Mukuro's neck. Mukuro's hands traveled from Gokudera's hair to his upper back, where his fingers curled against Gokudera's skin.

Gokudera's hands were moving, too, slipping Mukuro's shirt off to explore his chest and stomach, with enough pressure so as not to set off Mukuro's ticklishness. Which was smart, because Mukuro would have kicked him off if he'd tried.

As Gokudera trailed kisses up along Mukuro's jaw, his hands settled on Mukuro's hips, pushing his pants and boxers down until his thumbs could stroke bare skin. Mukuro turned his head enough to rub his cheek against Gokudera's.

"Do you want to have sex again?" Mukuro asked.

Gokudera shook his head. "Just want to touch you."

Mukuro understood the sentiment – sometimes just touching and being touched, the knowledge that someone else _wanted _to touch and be touched, was comforting in and of itself.

"Mm. Do what you want, then," Mukuro purred. Gokudera snorted, a burst of hot air against Mukuro's neck.

"If you use that tone of voice, we _will _have sex," Gokudera told him, lips brushing against Mukuro's pulse.

Mukuro had no objections to that, but he could tell Gokudera wasn't really in the mood. Emotionally, anyway – he was certainly in the mood physically. But Mukuro had no intention of pushing him over the edge if he didn't want to be pushed, so Mukuro just relaxed and enjoyed being kissed and caressed. In exchange, his hands languidly traversed Gokudera's back, fingers coaxing the tension out of Gokudera's body.

"If this is the kind of attention I get whenever you have a nightmare," Mukuro said with sleepy pleasure after a few minutes of mutual petting, "I hope you never sleep soundly, Hayato."

Gokudera growled, rolling them both onto their sides and grabbing onto Mukuro with all of his strength, burying his face against Mukuro's collarbone. "Shut up. Was trying to forget about that."

"Mm, my apologies," Mukuro drawled, shifting his arms around so he could keep stroking Gokudera's back. He kissed Gokudera's hair, then rested his chin on top of Gokudera's head. "You want to fall asleep like this? Usually you complain about me clinging on to you."

"Shut up," Gokudera grumbled again, sounding half-asleep. "Night, Mukuro."

Mukuro smiled, pulling Gokudera in closer. "Good night, Hayato."

* * *

_Mukuro_

Something felt off.

In the middle of the night, Gokudera groaned and opened his eyes. Mukuro had been in one of his moods all day, alternating between possessively clingy and stand-offishly creepy. He'd fallen asleep with all his limbs wrapped around Gokudera, effectively pinning him.

That's what was off. Mukuro wasn't touching him anymore.

Gokudera sat up and looked over at Mukuro, brow furrowed.

Mukuro was lying on his side, facing away from Gokudera, curled in on himself, every muscle straining with tension. He was emitting soft, panting growls, that abruptly hitched into a high, fearful whine.

Gokudera's eyes barely had time to widen before Mukuro whipped around, and all of a sudden Gokudera was pinned down on his back, Mukuro's knees straddling his hips, fingers tearing into the pillow on either side of Gokudera's head.

Gokudera stared up into Mukuro's face, and his heart rate accelerated, adrenaline surging through him.

Mukuro's expression was twisted into an animalistic snarl of rage, eyes full to the brim with black hatred and terror. Worst of all, there was no sense of awareness; from what Gokudera could tell, Mukuro was still asleep.

"Wake up!" Gokudera snapped at him. He wanted to throttle Mukuro, but every instinct warned against touching him in the state he was in. Not unless it was absolutely necessary to defend himself. If he could avoid having to hurt Mukuro, he wanted to. "Goddammit, you bastard, wake the fuck up!"

Mukuro only bent in closer, and Gokudera could see what looked like blood pooling in the corners of his red right eye, black veining out from it as the six descended into five.

"Mukuro!" Gokudera yelped, panic and alarm lancing through him as something dark and sinister began to claw at his mind. He tried to scramble backwards, but he couldn't get out from underneath Mukuro. Three more seconds, and then he'd have to fight back. "_Mukuro!_"

Mukuro blinked, then inhaled sharply and began to breathe raggedly. The rage vanished, the hatred dimmed, and only the terror was left in his eyes. The red eye spun back to six.

"…Hayato…?" he whispered, staring at Gokudera with an almost painful uncertainty.

Gokudera let out a gusty sigh of relief, then reached to wrap his arms around Mukuro.

Mukuro shied back, and Gokudera paused.

"You okay, man?" Gokudera asked quietly. "It was just a nightmare, right?"

Mukuro's expression closed off, tense and wary. "…Are you afraid of me, Hayato?"

Gokudera blinked. "What? No. You freaked me out just now, yeah, but you can't blame me for that, you were going all horror movie creepy. If you'd actually attacked me, I would've kicked your ass, and so I was worried I'd have to hurt you. Unless you think I can't take you when you're _sleeping?_" he asked with a tight smile that was more bared teeth than anything else.

Mukuro just looked at him.

No, he didn't think that. But he didn't think that was related to the question he'd asked.

Gokudera sighed, holding out his arms. "Come here."

Mukuro hesitated, then slowly moved forward, until Gokudera could wrap his arms around him and pull Mukuro in the rest of the way.

Mukuro curled against him, resting his head on Gokudera's shoulder. Gokudera began to stroke Mukuro's hair, and Mukuro sighed as the tension began to slowly bleed out of him.

"What were you dreaming about, anyway?" Gokudera asked. When Mukuro didn't answer, Gokudera thought about what could have had Mukuro reacting like that, why his eye might have changed, and why it had changed to five, specifically. "The Realm of Humans?"

Mukuro hissed and tried to draw back, but Gokudera held firm.

"Okay, okay, shh, sorry." Gokudera rubbed Mukuro's back soothingly.

It took a few minutes of petting and reassurance, but Mukuro finally relaxed enough to rest his cheek against Gokudera's chest, sagging almost as if in defeat.

Gokudera had never seen Mukuro like this before. Hell, until tonight, he wouldn't even have considered the possibility that something could scare Mukuro so badly, let alone just a nightmare.

Maybe not _just _a nightmare, Gokudera allowed. After all, he had no idea what the Six Realms were like, except that whatever it was, it was bad enough to drive all of Mukuro's bitter hatred for the mafia. Hatred that was still more potent in Mukuro than anything else.

And that when Mukuro had experienced the Six Realms – inheriting the memories of others experiencing the first five (and dying as a result), and enduring the sixth himself – that had all felt real to him.

"Hayato."

Gokudera looked down at Mukuro, brow furrowing. Mukuro's voice was hoarse, as if he were still fighting the nightmare. "Yeah?"

"I want to hurt something."

Gokudera stiffened, and felt a shiver run down his spine as Mukuro's fingernails dug into his chest.

"I want to _break _something," Mukuro whispered, and now Gokudera could hear the pent up violence and aggression, straining for release. "…I don't want that something to be you."

Gokudera's jaw clenched. He could also hear the tacit request for permission to leave – and if Mukuro felt the need to ask for his permission first… that meant he had reason to believe Gokudera would want to stop him.

Which meant Mukuro didn't just want to hurt some_thing._

"If you're saying what I think you're saying, hell fucking no," Gokudera replied flatly, arms tightening around Mukuro to hold him in place. "You're not Hibari. You've got the self-control not to give in when you want to pick a fight. Use it."

Mukuro let out a frustrated, desperate snarl, fingernails biting deep enough into Gokudera's skin to draw pinpricks of blood. Gokudera grit his teeth, but only held Mukuro closer.

Mukuro stilled. Then, he tried to wrench away, putting most of his strength into it. Gokudera struggled to hold on, wrestling with Mukuro until they rolled off the bed onto the floor.

Mukuro's hands slammed down on either side of Gokudera's head, knees seizing Gokudera's hips, a predatory look in his eyes. Predatory, and at the same time almost desperately uncertain – Mukuro was struggling internally with himself. But he was still looking for some kind of outlet for the hatred and fear riding him from the nightmare.

Swallowing dryly, Gokudera's mouth settled with resolve as he lifted his chin, baring his throat. He fought his instincts and forced his body to relax in surrender, then reached to lightly cup Mukuro's cheek.

Mukuro had said once that he wanted to try incorporating pain into sex, right? Gokudera _really_ didn't want to, but if Mukuro needed a target that badly –

Mukuro's eyes widened, recognizing the offer for what it was, and what it meant. Then, much to Gokudera's surprise, Mukuro's expression twisted into one of distress before he bent down, forehead pressing against Gokudera's shoulder.

Gokudera let out his second gusty sigh of relief of the night, glad that Mukuro's mood seemed to be shifting away from violence. He wrapped one arm around Mukuro's back while his other hand stroked his hair. When Mukuro didn't react to Gokudera's fingers brushing the hair clips, he gently pulled them out so he could give the taller boy more thorough caresses. He ran his fingers through Mukuro's hair, hoping that petting would help Mukuro to relax again.

Mukuro's breath hitched. He sniffed, once, almost as if he were trying not to –

Something warm and wet dripped onto Gokudera's collarbone.

Shit.

It took a lot of self-control not to freeze up with shock, but Gokudera managed it. Instead, he increased his ministrations, rubbing Mukuro's back comfortingly with one hand as the other continued to massage his skull.

"Shh," Gokudera murmured soothingly, not sure what else to do. "Shh."

Mukuro shivered.

Gokudera eased them into a sitting position, making sure not to let his caresses slow. "Let's get back into bed," he said. "It's cold on the floor."

Mukuro didn't respond, but when Gokudera carefully began the process of standing, Mukuro allowed himself to be pulled along without resistance. Once Mukuro was on his feet, he straightened fully and Gokudera was able to get a look at his face.

Mukuro's eyes were slightly red-rimmed, but there was no other sign of tears. He refused to meet Gokudera's gaze, and his expression was both closed-off and extremely fragile.

"You okay?" Gokudera asked, feeling awkward and uncertain. He'd left his hands where they were, and Mukuro wasn't pulling away, but he got the sense that Mukuro was retreating emotionally.

"Let's just go back to sleep," Mukuro replied, sounding tired.

"…Sure."

They got back into bed, and lay down facing each other. Mukuro buried his nose in the juncture between Gokudera's neck and shoulder, one hand digging into the sheet over Gokudera's hips. After they'd both settled in and gotten comfortable, Gokudera tentatively began to stroke Mukuro's hair and back again. Mukuro gave a short, soft hum to let him know the petting was still welcome.

After a few minutes of silence, Gokudera began roughly, "If you ever want to talk about… stuff… I'll listen. I know you probably _won't_ want to, and that's fine too, but, uh… I just wanted to let you know that."

Mukuro didn't reply, but that didn't surprise Gokudera. He closed his eyes, and let himself drift off.

Just before his awareness had completely faded, Gokudera thought he heard Mukuro whisper, "Thank you, Hayato."

* * *

End A/Ns: These occur on separate nights in case that wasn't obvious.

For their nightmares, I picked my headcanons of what they both fear the most – for Gokudera, it's Tsuna being killed in front of him while he's helpless to stop it, and for Mukuro, it's the Six Realms. (I don't have any concrete headcanon for what they're like – better to just leave it up to each individual's imagination imo – but I have decided that the Realm of Humans is the one Mukuro personally found most terrifying even though his memories of it are second-hand.)

This might be just me but I think all the characters who serve as arc villains at some point in KHR (Mukuro, Xanxus, Byakuran, Daemon, and Bermuda, and probably Checkerface/Kawahira too while we're at it) all have some emotional stability issues. These tend to vary widely because they all have different problems and they all use different facades with varying degrees of success to try and hide the fact that they're really fucked up, but… yeah.

Emotionally unstable and/or disturbed fictional characters are the best though. *thumbs up*

Timeline-wise, these would probably happen three and four weeks after "Desires" respectively (Gokudera only sleeps over at Kokuyo Land on non-school nights), so it's late February and they've been dating about two months. The "Five Senses" drabbles are also spread across mid-late February, but they all happen before the night of Mukuro's nightmare.

I do have one more one-shot already written for the TOMB-verse which I will try and post soon.

And asdfghjkl these end notes are too long I'm sorry. ;_; I LIKE TALKING THOUGH CAN YOU TELL


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